Saturday, October 6, 2007

What goes up, must come down

I realized the other day that what I've been feeling for the last 10+ (!) months is the opposite of the adrenaline high. When you're running on adrenaline, you feel that rush, that energy, that sense of power and efficiency and purpose, getting things done...important things. It is a high, and it is addictive.

And as they said on Grey's Anatomy (sorry) the other night, every addiction eventually comes full circle. Every "high" has a corresponding "low." It catches up with us.

The low for me was weakness, no energy, exhaustion, powerlessness and being overwhelmed by small exertions and stresses. The low of cutting back on everything that gives me joy. The surrender of ever saving the world or doing anything "important" again.

But in the quietness, and loneliness, I have rediscovered...me. Me minus the high. And perhaps it is enough.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Promise of power

Our fam was at my brother’s church in Chattanooga on Sunday morning, visiting him at school, and this funny guy preached on Isaiah 40. I should have done a Bible study long ago on weariness and strength...well, if I had the energy. : } I’ve camped on Matt 11 “Come unto Me, all who are weary...” a little bit. But these well-known verses in Isaiah 40 struck me, and soon I was a puddle in the pew. Let them encourage you this morning, any fellow Addy comrades! And btw the whole chapter is applicable and...comforting.

“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, does not faint or grow weary; there is no searching of His understanding.

“He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound].

“Even youths shall faint and be weary, and [selected] young men shall feebly stumble and fall exhausted;

“But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired.” Isaiah 40:28-31, Amplified

That’s us! Faint, weary, feeble, no might. What could be more applicable? He has PROMISED to give us power and increase our strength, and to make us fly like eagles!? I don’t know what this means, but I’m waiting and hoping and expecting for Him to show me, and work it in me.